I had the pleasure of sitting down to talk with Maureen Flores, a domestic violence advocate who works for Dove, Inc. Dove is the only domestic violence agency serving the Norfolk county area of Massachusetts, which includes Quincy and the South Shore.
We talked about the different types of domestic violence, what family and friends should say to someone who they suspect is being battered, and the different types of services that Dove offers.
Family Law Myths Exposed: Part 3
May 14th, 2010Part III of an ongoing series exposing the truth about Family Law Myths. To see the truth about more Family Law Myths, see Parts I and II.
Myth: If I’m completely uncooperative, I can stop the case from moving forward.
Truth: All too often, people believe that if they refuse to participate in the process (divorce, child custody, child support, alimony, paternity, etc.), the process can’t move forward. The truth is that while this might stall the proceedings temporarily, it won’t work for long. Not only will the process move forward, but it will more than likely end with a final result that you absolutely hate. Why? The courts can only make decisions based on what is presented to them, and the other party has no responsibility to tell them your side of the story.
Your failure to respond to filings and refusal to show up for court dates hurts only you. Only you (and your attorney) can defend your interests. The thought of going to court makes everyone anxious. It’s not a pleasant way to spend your day. But what’s at stake is too important to let anxiety get in the way. If you ignore the process, the process will go forward, ignoring you.
Myth: A good lawyer can be found cheaply or for free.
Truth: You wouldn’t walk into the super market and ask for free food. A brand new car with an incredibly low price tag would probably make you suspicious. So why would you expect a good family law attorney to be cheap or free? Like all other things, when it comes to legal services, you get what you pay for. Why would you want to pinch pennies with what is at stake in a family law matter?
If you truly cannot afford a family law attorney, it may be worthwhile to look into pro bono (free) legal services that may be available to you. There are a few things worth remembering when looking for these services:
- Just calling private attorneys offices and asking for free or discounted rates likely isn’t going to get you free or discounted services. It’s not that attorneys don’t want to help you, it’s that they can’t afford to!
- Family law matters are matters of civil law. This means you don’t have the right to an attorney. That only applies to criminal matters.
- Legal services agencies (agencies that receive funds from the Commonwealth to provide free legal services) can only provide services to individuals who, at the very least, meet income requirements. In lawyer terms, you must be “indigent.” This typically means your household’s income is equal to or less than 175% of the Federal Poverty Line. Right now, that’s approximately $13,500/year +$4,500/year for each additional family member living in the household.
**Even if you meet this requirement, different agencies have different “priorities” for service. These priorities are set by the Commonwealth when the agency is created. While the agency might have discretion to accept other cases, they also have practical limits like their funding and their caseload. Often these agencies can’t accept all cases that fall within their priorities, let alone accept ones that fall outside of them.
Restraining Orders
May 23rd, 2008Unfortunately, restraining orders (ROs) are common in family law practice. They arise no only between boyfriend and girlfriends, but husband and wives, ex spouses and in-laws. Some ROs are justified and some are clearly an act of malice against a former spouse or current lover.
ROs or Chapter 209A orders can prohibit the abuser from doing a number of things.
- No abuse – The court can order the abuser to stop abusing you or someone in your household
- No contact – The court can order the abuser to have no contact with you, either directly or indirectly
- Vacate – The court can order the abuser to stay away from your home or workplace by a specified number of yards
- Custody – The court can order that you have temporary custody of your minor children
- Support – The court can order the abuser to pay alimony and child support
- Damages – The court can order the abuser to reimburse you for expenses or damages incurred as a result of the abuse
- Impound address – The court can withhold your address from any court proceedings and keep it confidential from the abuser
- Treatment recommendation – The court can recommend the abuser to attend a treatment program but cannot order them to do so unless they have already violated a RO
- Surrender of firearms – The court may order the abuser to surrender firearms, licenses to possess firearms, or firearm identification cards.
ROs can be filed in either the district court, probate court, or superior court. Superior Courts however are not equipped to handle ROs and are limited in their jurisdiction. It is better to either file in district court or probate court, depending on your particular situation. If you already have a case pending in the probate courts (divorce, custody, guardianship), then it is a good idea to file any ROs in the same court so everything can be adjudicated together. ROs can also be filed at police stations after working hours. These are emergency ROs and are only valid for a period of no more than 24 hours. You are then required to appear in district court the following day to get an extension, and then 10 day after that in order to extend the RO to one full year.
RO hearings can be considered a mini-trial. Issues such as burden of proof and production, rules of evidence and proper court procedures must be considered. If your abuser has an attorney present at any of the RO hearings, it is a good idea to have an attorney of your own to help you defend yourself. There are instances when your abuser can ask the court for a reciprocal RO and the court may grant Mutual ROs. Because of this and many other reasons, you should have an attorney stand with you when asking the court for a RO.
Lastly, it needs to be said that a RO is simply a piece of paper. It empowers police and the court to exact harsh punishment to an abuser for violating a RO but the piece of paper will not protect you if the abuser really wanted to hurt you. If at any time, you feel in danger for yourself or your family, seek help through local police, hospitals, domestic violence shelters or counselors. Only you have the power to protect yourself and your family.